BNW

From Fandom wank wiki

Big Name Wanka:

A nebulous beast, with jaws that bite and claws that catch.

Ever in fear of catching its own reflection, the BNW can only be said to exist in a state of Heisenbergian Uncertainty, as to attempt to exploit BNW status for one's own ends (say, an iPod) would immediately render the BNW opening to accusations of wanking, and thus destroy their carefully wrought status.