Fandom Wank Hotline

Thank you for calling the fandom_wank batshit crazy line.

If you wish to post entirely in caps, press 1.

If you wish to make incomprehensible comments that may or may not be insults, press 2.

If you wish to state that you're only here to show how little you care about fandom_wank and its cabalistic vagina, press 3.

If you've had too much sugar and you need a lie down, press 4.

For all other queries, press 5.

If you wish to speak to an operator, you're even crazier than you look.

Thank you for calling the fandom_wank batshit crazy line. We hope that you get the help you so sorely need for your many unique issues, but feel free to call again.